It's been a while since my last post, so I thought I'd kick off what I hope to be a more productive period in my blog with some random news and Internet goodies. So here goes.

Here's a precious one for those of us who hate people: Poopsenders, also known as Shitsenders for the profane among us. These guys'll send a package of animal doo-doo to any address you specify. Anonymously. They put a business card in the bag of poo in the package which says "You've been pooped on. Wanna know by whom? (Look on back of card)" or something to that effect. Seeing as the card in question has its back in a steaming pile of shite (not a typo), your unfortunate victim will have to open the bag, reach in there, and take the card out to see the back, which says: "We'll never tell". Mission accomplished.

In other news, some group of Russian scientists thinks that the Large Hadron Collider, the largest particle accelerator ever made, will open a hole in the time-space continuum. A lot of other scientists (read: everybody else) is pretty sure this sucker's gonna prove the existence of the enigmatic Higgs Boson, a so called "God Particle" that endows all other elementary particles with mass. This latter prediction, I believe, is the more probable one, but the conspiracy theorists out there might want to have their anti-brain wave helmets on when the LHC goes on-line in case aliens from the future step through the gaping hole it creates in the middle of Switzerland. That's where it's located, by the way. Oh, cruel irony: the Swiss, the most unassuming, harmless people ever, shall be the first to experience extreme nuclear death at the hands of hostile extraterrestrials. The Canadians will be next, mark my words.

Anyway, that's all I can do for now. Gotta go chill with Lee. I'll write some more over the weekend.

Listening to Weezer. Reading Cormac McCarthy.

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